09 August 2011

It's about listening to what is real.

I woke up this morning and started it the most normal way.
I check my messages from my phone in bed.
I let my dog out.
I knelt in pray and then I logon on to facebook. haha.

And I was completely humbled, when I found this.

A couple of days ago, I wrote a post about who I am.

I feel like I know spiritually.

But there is this huge gap I wonder about.

What and Who will I become when I grow up..

Most of these thoughts in my mind tell me,
that it is my choice...
and so I need to make the right,
more best choice.

So when I read this post above, all I can think about was this wonderful woman.
I met her as I started my mission in Eagar, AZ.

She was quiet and strong and in tune with the spirit. She has suffered adversity in the darkest of ways,
yet, she remained available to lift others and support her family.

As I thought about her words, so many of my own came to my mind.. along with some quotes from apostles.

The two following ideas, coupled with my passion to create, have helped me find a path. kinda

  I would say to this woman of faith of Northern Arizona, 
you followed a prompting to share this with me. 
Thank you.
I have struggled to know where I fit in the Fine Art world,
 for I am quite sensitive spiritually,
 but I love creating.
 I struggle to fit into the Wedding Industry too,
 for I don't have the full passion
 to become the
 best photography or videographer
 for those types of events.

But if you place me in a home,
 with a family that tries their best to love. 
That struggles to remember the huge picture, 
I feel best fit. 
What type of a career does this leave me? 
I honestly am  un sure 
because the first thoughts that come to my mind is
That I belong in motherhood, 
but as I remember I don't have a husband, 
and thus far I have just been trying
 to create my own home, 

And as I have recognized this, 
I have been so blessed to drop everything to be
 in Arizona with 5 or 6 families.
 and here in Utah, I spend plenty of 
time with new little young families.

Because I don't partake in my own motherhood or wifehood yet,
does not mean I cannot enjoy the blessings of families.

For this is what I strive to accomplish artistically.